Friday, January 26, 2007

Going to the dogs
I've been wasting a lot of time working on my tshirt shop Absolute Cotton.

I don't really need the money, but I get a kick out of designing and selling weird stuff on the internet. I suppose it's like an online version of Monopoly for the socially impaired. In the game, I'm somewhere between Baltic Avenue and the bottom of the little shiny boot.

Last night, I drank a lot of beer and decided I needed a pet section - so here you go:

Some things are only funny when a dog says them.

I get a monthly check...

I wore this same dress...

Doggie style

She killed the last one...

got leg?

Bitches love me should see my sexy nightie

...And I vote!

posted by Carl Bryant @ 5:16 PM   11 comments Literary Shirts

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At 1:15 PM, Blogger SarahJane said...

cool shop, carl. auntie em looks especially nice.



At 6:09 PM, Blogger Arlene said...

teehee. those dog shirts are a riot, carl.



At 6:22 PM, Blogger Arlene said...

oh, and your 70/300 lens makes my 14/45 look so small. there. i admitted it.

but stop boasting about your "fly rod". we all know what you mean. perv. **snicker**


p.s. your customers sound like my mom. no wonder i moved to another continent.



At 3:29 PM, Blogger Dennis Mickley said...

Funny stuff, Carl.

Also, I'd like to thank you - I have a fledgling blog, and I've used a lot of your advice on the blogger help board to get things going. Although my dedicated readership is currently limited to my mother and ex girlfriend, it's been nice.

One final question, though - does the new blogger have a built in hit tracker? I couldn't seem to find one, and it's tempting me to switch to wordpress.



At 3:44 PM, Blogger Carl Bryant said...

Thanks, Sarah. It's a hobby. :)

Arlene, surprisingly... most dog owners don't want people knowing their pets receive a social security check, so I've sold none. Go figure.

Dennis, you may add a hit tracker to your template manually. I use google analytics on most of my websites, but you may use any tracker you like. When you sign up for (free) google analytics or any other hit counter, you'll be provided with a bit of code.

Paste that code into your template - right before the end of the body tag and visitor statistics will be logged. Sign into your account at the hit counter's website to view your stats.



At 2:21 PM, Blogger LKD said...

I can't believe you haven't slapped "Who's your daddy?" or "I wanna be your dog" (I love that damned song) or "I'm not your bitch, bitch!" (which might actually be an untouchable phrase since Bravo is selling t-shirts with that snappy line from last season's Top Chef) on one of these t-shirt, Carl.

Or, "Fetch it yourself."


Do you make cat t-shirts as well? Bob might considering purchasing one if you slapped a catchy enough phrase on it.



At 9:24 AM, Blogger Carl Bryant said...

Laurel - ever put cute little baby socks on a cat?

They wig out. Jump around. Panic.

Very funny, but cruel - in a weird Capra/Kafka sort of way.



At 12:59 PM, Blogger LKD said...

Ah, Carl, but that's why I'm a cat lover (heck, I love dogs, too--I just don't currently have one, alas)--they won't tolerate being demoralized by being dressed up in little sweaters and hats and boots and whatnot. I know Bob would never allow me to put a t-shirt on him--unless, perhaps I tranquilized him first, ha ha--but I still love the idea of him running around (okay, freaking the fuck out) the house in a t-shirt that says "got milk?" or...whatever.


Hell, cats won't even let you tote them around in purses.

I've always liked cats because they're so damned independent. They've got minds of their own (most of 'em, anyway).

Do you have cats? Or dogs?



At 1:22 PM, Blogger Carl Bryant said...

I have cats and dogs.

Two large-breed dogs, and two cats.

The dogs are named licorice and mocha. The cats are grudgingly named "cat."

Cat number one was simply "Cat" until cat2 ('fraidy cat) took up residence. Then "cat" became "cat cat" - so we could tell them apart in conversation.

Catcat is a huge old tom, about 300 years old and far too lazy to run from a dog. The dogs made the mistake of catching him once. Now, they whine and run away whenever catcat wanders near.

He lost an ear last year to a rottweiler.

Lord knows what the rottweiler lost.



At 2:44 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love dogs.

When do you feature Bunnies?

Quick line to let ya know I'm still alive, but terminally stupid.




At 5:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very funny, but cruel - in a weird Capra/Kafka sort of way.
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